Yesterday I heard an amazing speaker, KaRae’ Carey, PhD, give a most inspiring talk about staying positive during hard times. Since the title of this blog is Pain-Free Living, I thought I’d add her suggestions today because emotional stress can cause both mental and physical pain.
Dr. KaRae’ six suggestions:
Keep a Journal of Gratitude – Just take a little notebook and start writing down the things you’re grateful for. Write three things a day, and it doesn’t need to be huge things, it could be something as simple as you’re grateful that you have a roof over your head. It can be very easy to indulge in self-pity, blame and anger; appreciating what you have will help you stay positive.
Things Get Better. Remember the proverb: “This too shall pass away.” Your negative feelings won’t last forever, there is a light at the end of every tunnel…eventually you WILL feel better. When you understand and accept the volatile nature of life, it’s a lot easier to stay calm and relaxed – even in the hardest of times.
Mental List of Awesomeness Having high self-esteem keeps anxiety at bay, improves personal relationships and encourages optimism. If you don’t appreciate yourself enough – or are feeling down – try making a mental list of awesome stuff you’ve done recently. Your list could include “I helped my friend move,” or “I went for a jog instead of watching TV.” Look at yourself from the outside…you are awesome!
What’s The Worst That Could Happen? Paolo Coelho was right when he wrote: “The fear of suffering is worse than suffering itself.” Little things can get blown way out of proportion. Ask Yourself “what’s the worse thing that could happen,” and you’ll be able to look at the now-reality and see it’s not as bad as it could be…and then go back to “this too will pass away.”
Look at the negative situations as your training sessions for real life. The higher you climb in life, the worse the negative situations would be, so you better be prepared for them. Realize you can’t please everyone. In fact nobody can. Sometimes you need to just let some people go. Realizing this will relieve you from a lot of unnecessary burden so you can focus on the people that you can positively interact with.
Reach Out and Help Someone We live in a culture that encourages egotism. If you want to feel great about yourself, try giving to someone else. Calling your mom will make her day…giving some food to a homeless person will help the both of you feel better…donating some time to someone or some organization who can’t pay you back will lift you up more than you can imagine! When you make a big difference with just a few minutes – or a few dollars – you’ll always remember how important and amazing you are. And with an attitude like that, it’s hard to be anything but positive.
Dr. KaRae’ Carey is a Life Coach in Raleigh, NC. She can be reached by calling her office: 919-454-7857.
Have a wonderful weekend,